I have endured several months of losing my beloved animals. The panic of loss that I fought so with Anorexia comes rushing back. Seventy eight pounds of starvation could not stop it then and nothing else can stop it now.So, I bow down to it. I give, I surrender. My Beloveds leave my life and I can only wait to be reunited with them one day. Eighteen years of Anorexia could not make it go away. Loss will find us all- always. So, I simply cannot run from it . I can only suffer through. DAMN.